This is what I do to help me sleep
I am a wife, mom and business owner. And I have anxiety. I have found a meditation tool that has helped me overcome anxiety induced sleeplessness.
My bouts with anxiety began soon after my 2nd baby. Since then, it has had a fairly predictable presence in my life…through having a third baby, starting my own interior design business, multiple moves AND running a household of 3 busy boys (4 including my husband) and a stubborn Olde English Bulldog!
“I am a wife, mom and business owner. And I have anxiety. ”
For the most part, I have come to accept its existence. Its just another complex part of what makes me ‘me’… at least that’s what the self-help books have taught me. Can’t say its not frustrating! Especially when it stands in the way of a much needed good nights sleep. I lie in bed. The house is quiet. My husband is snoring next to me (another reason I can’t sleep but we’ll save that for another time) and I lie wide awake with my mind is running the 100 M dash on repeat and I can physically ‘feel’ the weight of my thoughts pressing down on my chest. Often, I am not even aware of its build up during a seemingly uneventful, busy, but average, day. But there it is as soon as my head hits the pillow. I cannot turn my brain off, despite my body feeling exhausted. Frustration quickly sets in…knowing that my sleep is being hijacked…and that my morning alarm is set to go off at 5:20 am (insert tears here). This has been my reality for years, and today I want to share with you one thing that has been very helpful for me.
In an effort to ‘shake off the day’ and be relaxed when I got into bed, I have tried taking warm showers, reading and journaling. These helped somewhat but only off and on. When I would turn the lights out, my mind would start up again. I researched, read about and tried a variety of meditation styles. But I have to say…I found it impossible to concentrate on my breath for more that 10 seconds. Let thoughts come in and gently release them?? Not a chance, my thoughts come in… and build a house in there! (is that the designer in me or does that happen to you as well?) I needed something that would ‘distract’ me for long enough that I would fall asleep before the momentum of the anxiety would build.
“Not a chance, my thoughts come in… and build a house in there!”
A friend of mine (who happens to be a therapist), mentioned an App called Insight Timer that she uses herself. I downloaded it that same night and have been using it since. There are thousands of guided voice and music meditation categories built into this app. I found guided voice meditations from the “Sleep” category to be the most helpful for me. I select the desired meditation and settle into bed. The soothing voice of the guide instructs me as I follow along, bringing awareness to my body and breath, releasing tension. I am distracted from my usual pattern of thoughts. Almost without fail, I am lulled to sleep and the App automatically turns off at the end of the session.
I have learned is that it’s totally ok to use an external tool (such as an App) to help with meditation. I have also learned that my surroundings are instrumental to my feelings of relaxation and well being. It is so important to have a space in your home that will support your meditation practice in a way that makes you feel calm, secure and supported. Whether your goal is to take a quick relaxation break in the middle of the day or to relax into sleep at night, create a space in your home that cultivates comfort and calm. My bedroom is that place for me. I have kept the color palette calm, neutral and serene. My tall, winged headboard (upholstered in a luxurious velvet fabric) is akin to climbing into a hug every night. It reminds me of a cocoon and makes me feel protected. I also splurged on a really good quality mattress (Tempur-Cloud Supreme…one of Oprah’s favourite things for 2017!). We spend roughly 1/3 of our lives in bed! Investing in a quality mattress has been one of the BEST decisions I have made. I truly feel that my guided meditation helps me fall asleep and my comfortable mattress helps me stay asleep.
“I have learned is that it’s totally ok to use an external tool to help with meditation.”
I am sharing this with you in case it is helpful to anyone who struggles to calm their brain at night. Guided meditation is worth a try and Insight Timer is one solution that has been very helpful to me. I am in no way affiliated with this app, it is simply a tool that has given me results after trying many approaches. My hope is that it will help you too! If you have any questions about my experience or can share what has worked for you, I would love to hear from you. Need some help in creating a serene, comforting space in your home? Let’s set up a consultation. I want to help you feel better and live better.
